


First Time's A Charm

by semele



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-21
Updated: 2018-09-21
Packaged: 2019-07-15 01:31:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16052675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/semele/pseuds/semele
Summary: Modern AU. Bellamy is a virgin, and it generally isn't a big deal. Except one day he becomes curious, and his friend Raven is very wonderful.Written for Ravenbell Fic Exchange.





	First Time's A Charm

**Author's Note:**

  * For [growlery](https://archiveofourown.org/users/growlery/gifts).



> For Growlery, who prompted: _bellamy/raven - virgin!bellamy enlists his best friend raven to experiment with this whole sex thing. casually. but then both of them catch feelings._
> 
> I have a feeling that this isn't exactly what you wanted, mostly on the "casual" front, but I hope you enjoy it anyway! This prompt just wouldn't leave me alone, I had to know how it would play out!

Most of the time, it feels to Bellamy like he missed the right window for a lowkey introduction into sex, not that it should be any kind of a big deal. He’s well past the age of people being dicks about him being a virgin (mostly because they have no way of knowing), and he doesn’t really have any urgency to change things. He isn’t saving himself for The One or anything like that, but if he survived his teens and early twenties without getting naked with someone, he might as well do it right when he gets to it. Sleep with someone he actually likes, stuff like that. It sounds like a healthy thing to do.

Back in high school, he was anything but healthy, but with his mother’s tight control on the family, not to mention her very own paranoid brand of sex ed, it didn’t even occur to him to do anything that could even tangentially lead to a pregnancy. Someone with a penis would’ve probably worked better with his anxiety, but that simply didn’t happen – not even with Miller, mostly because Bellamy’s moments of horny courage never quite coincided with Miller’s moments of being single.

And that’s how it went – just a series of coincidences combined with not trying very hard to make sex happen, even as teenage shyness gave way to early-twenties uninspiring dates. Truth to be told, it doesn’t really matter much. He is curious and a little bit wistful, but not embarrassed anymore, and definitely not desperate.

Or, rather – he wasn’t embarrassed until he realized how wrong he was about being past the age of people being dicks about this.

“What do you mean – how old?” asks Wells as he picks up his beer, and rolls his eyes so hard his entire head moves a little. They are, all six of them, sitting in their favorite pizza place, and it’s half an hour into the evening, so they can’t even blame the quality of their conversation on being drunk.

“Virginity is a social construct,” pipes in Harper, and Raven nods vigorously, agreeing on principle.

“Fine.” Monty bangs on the table with the flat of his hand, and doesn’t continue until he has everyone’s attention. “Point taken, Miller is an asshole, but I’m curious now, so let me rephrase his question. How old were you the first time you got naked or semi-naked with someone, with the intention of getting each other off in some way?”

Well, Bellamy can’t fault Monty’s precision. He is just suddenly very interested in his beer.

“Seventeen,” volunteers Raven immediately, with her best challenge-accepted face. “But _I_ didn’t actually get off from it until nineteen. Over to you.”

“Yeah, no, I got off right away,” picks up Miller, and earns himself a well-deserved roar of laughter. “Six… No, wait, that doesn’t count, we chickened out and just made out. Monty, your definition sucks. Seventeen!”

“Twenty,” throws in Harper, but it’s not even audible, because in the exact same moment, Monty shrugs and announces: “Nineteen.”

Wells rolls his eyes again, but the lack of tension in his body betrays that he’s arguing on principle. Bellamy knows, trust him – he is all tension by now.

“Why are we even talking about this?” asks Wells impatiently. “That’s way too much information about some of you over pepperoni.”

“Because I read an article about how kids these days are starting way too young, and I got curious if it was just a straight thing.” Miller takes a sip of his beer. “Besides, your pepperoni isn’t even here yet, chill. So far, we are all above average for our respective genders, even if I am cutting it very fine. Unless you and Bellamy say something I totally didn’t expect, I’m gonna, I don’t know. Pitch an article to Buzzfeed or something, based on the extensive research I’ve just done.”

That’s it, Bellamy decides. He is going to have to say something, because Miller is not one for letting go, and he’d rather not prolong the agony. It’s fine. He hasn’t been so embarrassed about being a virgin it at least six years, but it’s totally fine.

“The numbers aren’t in yet, but I’ll let you know as soon as it happens,” he deadpans, and the pandemonium of the next five minutes (thankfully interrupted by the arrival of pizza) can’t even be described. Bellamy is pretty sure Monty actually does something akin to a spit-take, but with added grace, the way Monty usually does.

It’s Raven who redirects the conversation to pineapple on pizza, and Bellamy has never been more grateful in his life.

***

Raven texts him right that evening, saying that she’s sorry the others have been so beastly, and it takes Bellamy good two days to work up the will to respond.

_It’s fine. I don’t mind. I mean, I’m old enough that it’s objectively funny._

_Bullshit. Wanna go out for coffee or something?_

_Chill, Raven. Not that fragile._

_I didn’t say you’re fragile, I said I wanted coffee._

It’s not that he’s never been out for coffee just with Raven, even if it doesn’t happen a lot. Usually, she comes in a package with Monty, but she seems to like Bellamy on his own, too, what with them living nearby and often catching the same bus when coming back from group outings. She’s even done a few pretentious movie nights with him when no one else wanted to come, because she is that kind of a champ.

Still, this is suspicious. She’s clearly feeling bad about the pizza night, and trying to make it up to him somehow, as if it was possible to soothe Miller’s mockery with raspberry muffins.

Oh, what a load of crap. Of course it’s possible to soothe Miller’s mockery with raspberry muffins. Bellamy is an adult, and Miller’s opinion about his sex life don’t actually affect him that much.

“We’re not discussing my virginity,” he announces as soon as they sit down in a hipster little coffee shop close to where they live.

“Noted,” she agrees, hands raised in surrender. “For the record, I wasn’t going to. Just… wanted to see you’re okay, I guess. You seemed a bit…”

“I mean, this isn’t a new condition. I’m kind of used to it.”

He actually manages to deliver that in a reasonably flat tone, and Raven looks at him in silence for all of two seconds before she bursts out laughing.

“Okay, fair. It was, like, two parts care one part morbid curiosity. I mean, I’m really sorry that Miller is a dick, not that it’s any of my business, anyway… How? No, hold on, I sound like Miller, let me... “ She goes quiet for a moment, and, to Bellamy’s surprise, he doesn’t actually brace himself. It seems okay, Raven asking. He doesn’t mind it one bit.

“How come I’m twenty six and I never got laid?” he asks helpfully, and leans back, fingers toying with the rim of his cup. “Before you ask, it’s not a religious thing or anything like that. Just… coincidence, I guess?”

“I thought we weren’t talking about your virginity?” says Raven cheekily, and Bellamy can’t help a smile. 

“Let’s say it feels good to talk about it without feeling like I’m in a zoo or something.”

Raven shrugs in the usual display of her ability to take compliments, but when she looks at him, there is something soft about her face.

“I think everyone was so surprised they kind of ended up showing their assholes, nevermind, please ignore that comparison. Anyway. You’re hot, confident, and a genuinely decent guy, so it’s like… If you can’t get a date, who can?”

Well, now it’s his turn to be excellent at taking compliments.

“Please don’t tell me I need to go out more. I’d make a fool out of myself.”

“Don’t you miss it?” she asks, and, unfortunately, this is exactly the right question. In some ways, it hits him harder than Miller’s hastily contained mockery, and Raven isn’t even done yet. “Okay, _miss_ is the wrong word, but… You know what I mean, right? I’m single now, and it’s lonely as fuck. You might be… you know. Oh, fuck it. You might’ve never had sex, but you’re not naive or anything. You know what you’re missing.”

Yes. Yes, he does.

***

It takes a few more days for Miller and Monty to get over their respective awkwardnesses, and apologize, then slowly but surely the Virgin Pizza Disaster fades away in everyone’s memories.

Well, mostly.

It’s the conversation with Raven that stubbornly sticks to Bellamy’s brain, stirring thoughts he really would be better off without. It’s not like this is the first time he’s noticing that Raven is attractive, but until now, he saw it in a settled, idle way, almost resigned – like there is nothing he can do until he gets some kind of a clear sign from her, and in absence of it, he can’t take any kind of initiative himself.

Except that moment of honesty changed something between them, and Bellamy doesn’t think he is the only one feeling it. He flatters himself that he catches Raven watching him sometimes, checking out the outline of his body or fixating on a detail, then pulling herself up as if she’d just gotten distracted for a moment. He might be wrong about this, of course – it might be that he thinks she does it simply because that’s what he does to her, more and more often, until Wells starts nudging him under the table during group outings to help him not to make a fool out of himself when someone asks him a question.

He can’t just ask her to sleep with him because he’s curious what it would feel like, because that’s way too awkward, not to mention other problems, but trying to ask her for a date when they’re already friends is awkward, too, lose-lose, good luck, Blake, to you and your blue balls. To make things worse, they actually meet for coffee a few more times, just the two of them, because that shop they went to the first time is amazing, and no one else from the group can be bothered to come to their part of town. Raven refuses to be deprived of lime cheesecake just because Monty can’t be fucked to hop on a bus, so it’s Bellamy who meets her instead, and he isn’t exactly complaining, but there is no denying that the longer this goes on, the more of a crush he has.

He knows he has it bad when they’re coming back from Wells’ birthday. They’re both a little bit buzzed, and he just freezes in place for a moment, because their bus passes some kind of a rare motorcycle parked on the sidewalk, Raven goes into full nerd meltdown mode, and it’s the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen.

“God, I could kiss you,” he blurts out, and then it’s Raven’s turn to freeze; to make half a step towards him, then stop, deer in headlights, and put her hand on his chest.

“Bell, this is a terrible idea.”

He laughs uncomfortably, her touch burning in annoyingly new ways, as if he’s never been touched at all, and hangs his head.

“It’s okay, sorry. I just… Sorry, that was a stupid thing to say.”

And he has a feeling that he’ll pay for it dearly.

***

He gets summoned to their coffee shop first thing the next morning, and for once, he doesn’t even have a suspicion of what might be going on in Raven’s head. Does she want to tell him off? Scold him in a more formal environment? Let him down gently? Nothing actually happened last night, so why is she drawing attention to it?

Well, he doesn’t have to wait long for an answer. By the time he arrives, his face and hands chilled from the autumn wind, Raven is already waiting in her favorite armchair, with an untouched cup of coffee sitting in front of her.

“Just tell me if I’m making a fool out of myself,” she says quickly as soon as she sees him, and the realization that she is nervous rather than angry confuses Bellamy even more.

“What are you…” he tries, but Raven interrupts him, clearly to antsy to let him answer questions.

“Did you really try to kiss me last night? I mean… Did you really want to, or am I just spinning things? I’m not spinning things, right? I’ve felt like a moron since I texted you this morning, but I had to.”

She seems genuinely distressed, and that, finally springs him into action. He even forgets that he’s supposed to order a coffee here. First things first – he has to sit down, and put his hand on Raven’s wrist.

“No, you’re not spinning anything. I was… I’ve been thinking about it for a while, then liquid courage… It slipped out. I’m sorry.”

Except she doesn’t let him finish. Instead, she leans in, and kisses him full on the mouth.

It’s not his first kiss, but it’s been so long since the last one that it might as well be. It’s slow, and clumsy, then takes a turn to greedy, when he realises that he is allowed, even if for a second, to touch Raven’s face, maybe even stroke down her hair, gentling her towards him. It’s a greedy kiss, he knows that for a fact, because it leaves him wanting so much more.

“But you said it was a terrible idea,” he protests, as if he was bothered by what’s happening. 

“Yeah, because we were both drunk. But…”

“But the sexual tension is still there while sober?” he prompts, and Raven nods, nervous laugh and all.

“I just didn’t want to… Fuck, this is awkward,” she says, and hides her face in her hands a little. “Are you… I mean, with you…”

“I’m not saving myself for marriage,” he deadpans, and she relaxes a little, as if that was an actual thing she was anxious about. Great. “Look, this doesn’t have to be… We’re friends, right? It doesn’t have to be... We’re talking about it like adults. That’s all fine. Could we maybe just… Go talk about it like adults in a place that’s less public?”

“Good point,” says Raven quickly, and gets up, then bends down to at least sip at her still untouched coffee before she comes up to the bar, pays for it, and doesn’t turn to face him until she’s pretty much in the door. “Come on, we’re going to my place. Wanna walk?”

Yes. Yes, he does.

Cool air seems to be doing Raven as much good as it does him, and Bellamy finds himself just staring at his shoes as she overcomes the initial stumbling. 

“People who wait that long often have a reason,” she says simply. “But you keep saying it’s a coincidence, and I don’t want to be a patronizing asshole, so… It’s okay if you’re just curious and you wanna try with someone, you know? It’s okay. I just want to know you’re sure, and, honestly… I’ve been single for ages, and you’re all… Bellamy. So it’s all okay.”

“Can’t think of a better person to try with,” he says without thinking, and to his great shock, it’s actually true. He hasn’t met anyone in years that he’d want to bother to take to bed, but Raven… Yes. Yes, it all clicks into place. He very much does want Raven.

The rest of the way to Raven’s place is as nervous and rushed as it is strangely reverential. They stop by a drug store to buy some condoms and a bottle of lube, and even that feels a little bit ritualistic, like they’re going through the motions of some initiation rite that Bellamy isn’t fully aware of, but Raven knows in intimate detail. 

They don’t kiss again until they’re in Raven’s room, and the privacy of the closed doors makes Bellamy bolder; lets him put his hands on Raven’s hips and draw her close, then slip his fingers under her shirt to stroke her lower back, gentle. You see, Bellamy has plans for how his first night is supposed to go; years and years of built-up tenderness waiting to happen, carefully planned out in his head. He has so many ideas he could fill at least twelve rounds just from the top of his head.

Except this isn’t a night, is it? He is about to have his first time in the bright light of a Sunday morning, his cheeks still a little bit cold the walk outside, and just that small deviation from the plan makes him feel like he is jumping head first into something he can’t even begin to understand.

Then Raven moves to take off his shirt, and he knows for sure he is out of his depth in the best way possible.

Somewhere at the back of his head, he always expected that there’d be something sharp about sex; something volatile and a little bit lonely. But even though Raven claws at him greedily, and he isn’t exactly composed, either, he feels soothed every step of the way, like he has found something missing. Once they are both naked, Raven guides him to lie on his back, and straddles his hips like she belongs there, taking him in in slow waves, then not slowly at all. 

“I feel like I should say thank you, or something,” he mutters when they’re resting afterwards, and Raven groans comically, thoroughly familiar in her exasperation.

“You were doing so well until now,” she complains, and Bellamy only hesitates for a second before kissing her quiet.

***

It turns out Bellamy doesn’t have to wait long for his first night. By the time he and Raven crawl out of bed, groggy from an impromptu post-orgasmic nap, it’s more or less time for early dinner, and they decide to go out for it together, with a tacit understanding that afterwards, they would come back straight to Raven’s bed.

“That was surprisingly dignified,” says Bellamy as they’re waiting for their order. He stops himself from reaching out to take Raven’s hand, realizing belatedly that they aren’t naked anymore, and it would be awkward if he tried kissing her wrist here.

Raven looks strangely small in her favorite jacket, but she still gives him an honest laugh, even though she is a little lost in thought.

“You sound like you expected to trip over your own dick, or something.”

“Or something.” He smiles sheepishly, and since he can’t touch her now, he runs his hand through his own hair. “Look, I had good ten years to plan for everything that could go wrong, and then it was… I don’t know. Not easy, but… Good. It was so good. And I’m not gonna say that I’m glad I waited, or some other high school sex ed cliche, but… no regrets.”

In the end, it’s not such a big deal. They don’t move in together, or start spending every spare moment glued to each other; they don’t even talk about defining this thing between them for weeks, comfortable with it being just this, sharing words and sharing skin, and getting better at pleasure the more they know each other.

It isn’t until one exhausting Friday, when they meet in the evening, then give up halfway through foreplay, and fall asleep naked in Bellamy’s bed, that it dawns on him how maybe sex was never so important after all.


End file.
